Cookie Monster, Way Gay Sports, and Rockets Win Again

Cookie Monster

Photo credit: Flickr user nickstone333

Cookie Monster assist. Metta World Peace deployed Cookie Monster pajamas to support Collins coming out earlier this week. This is probably the second-weirdest MWP story this season, first being the bizarre movie-shoot prank turned major police mobilization in February. Also major props to MWP for trying to play through an MCL tear in a comeback year, then knowing when to quit during the Spurs series.

“Whether it’s a free country or not, you should be free to act and do as you want to do, as long as it’s not violent. I came here in a Cookie Monster shirt because I wanted to… And I was going to wear the pants but I thought you [media] guys were going to judge me. And I was going to wear the hat, too, but I figured you guys would judge me…. I should have wore it. You should be free to do and act how you want to act.”

Writer Sherman Alexie on Jason Collins: homophobes are jealous! I was a huge fan of Sherman Alexie before I knew who he was – Smoke Signals still ranks as an all time favorite movie, and it’s still taught college classes by stoner Ethnic Studies professors across the country. That he’s a hoops fan (the Seattle SuperSonics was/is/will be his team) makes me love him even more. He had a great article in The Stranger on Jason Collins I missed yesterday because of the May Day activities.

I’m overjoyed that an ostensibly straight-boy activity like basketball, my greatest love, is now being recognized as the homoerotic extravaganza that it is. After all, aside from swimming, diving, and water polo—the Holy Trinity of Way Gay Sports—basketball is the sport where men wear the least clothes. When playing ball, we’re essentially just in underwear. Hell, even among us pathetic hoopsters, we usually play shirts against skins. Yep, one team is always topless.

The beginning of the end for Oklahoma City? The Rockets won in commanding fashion last night despite OKC going for the Hack-Asik strategy way early in the fourth quarter. A couple notes:

  • Seriously, there is no way to rhyme “hack” and “Asik”, no matter how many times Chris Webber tries. It just doesn’t work. I suggest alternative verbs, like Sic-Asik or even Whack-Omer. You just can’t do it without butchering the Turkish name even more.
  • OKC’s problem was on the offensive end. Why not let the defense play since you got shot-blocking machine Serge Ibaka, known quality perimeter Thabo Sefolosha on the wing, and Derek Fisher turning back the clock and taking charges like it was 1999. You just can’t win when your No. 1 offensive option Kevin Durant can’t score a bucket in the fourth.
  • OK, maybe OKC coach Scotty Brooks thought Omer’s 13 made free throws was preferable to James Harden bombing from deep – Harden hit seven(!) in a row before missing two to finish for an astounding 78% 3-pt shooting.
  • You know things are bad when OKC was counting on Derek Fisher 3’s and dribble penetration to bring them back into the game. Ask a Laker fan, that’s never a recipe for success.
  • Garbage Time Hero: is Reggie Jackson! Thanks for the timely long jumpers and improbable drives. You made the game seem closer than it actually was and hid the fact that the final six minutes of the fourth quarter was really just garbage time.

I don’t see this team getting out of the second round without Russell Westbrook. The Grizz are looking really strong with two solid defensive outings against the Clips to lead the series 3-2, and if the Clips win the series in 7 games I can see the Clips’ deep bench (and incredible Chris Paul-Eric Bledsoe PG tandem) running OKC out of the building.

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